I leave for tour AGAIN tomorrow. I don't want to. I want to stay here in Stoughton with Julia and all my friends. I don't think this will ever change. I will always get really upset before I'm leaving, and just want to go home the whole time I'm gone. I enjoy playing every night more than anything, I just wish I could take everyone from Stoughton with me, then I wouldn't care at all that I was leaving. This time around will be interesting because Dan's coming, and it's our first tour with our solid 5 piece line-up. I went to Al's house last night with Dave. I didn't realize how long it's been since I've been there. His whole upstairs is re-done. He even fixed the infamous dangling ceiling fan in his room! It's sad knowing that it's not possible for me to sleep over there and worry about the fan crashing down on my face in my sleep. I know that sounds weird, but every time a little thing in life like that changes, it feels like a part of me dies. With this mentality, I can only get more depressed and sad as the years go on. I dread the day Al moves from that house, and I can't just turn down Rose Glenn and stop in and hangout. Because, the day will come someday. I can't bullshit myself.
It's 3:00 and all I can think about is leaving tomorrow. I'm going to my mom's to eat later on, I think Eric might be going too. I just can't take being away from home for so long.
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