Dallas, Texas

Sorry I haven't update this in a while, I haven't had much time to, but that's no excuse to not be writing in my Sidekick's notes section and importing it to this later. The shows have been going pretty good, last night was kind of weird though. It was a huge venue and not a lot of people were there, which never goes over that well. We played on the floor that had a weak spot in it. There were 2 kids that came up to me after the show and expressed how much they like Energy. One of them even told me that we are his favorite current hardcore band. Awesome.

Here are a couple of videos of us in Tampa, Florida on March 26th:





During this set I remember being hit extremely hard in the face during Invasions. My jaw still hurts from it.

We are in Dallas, Texas right now and the venue we're playing is unnecessarily big for the show that is taking place here tonight. We don't draw enough to pack vfw halls, so I don't see why we would be playing a 1,000 capacity place. 1,000 capacity is what it looks like at least.

Orlando, Florida - Charles'

I'm at Charles' house in Orlando Florida right now, as you can see in the title. Today was an off day and I didn't really do much besides walk around the area. There isn't really much to update about right now. The show in Jacksonville was alright. There weren't a lot of people there, and a couple people knew the words, but my overall favorite part was how good it felt to play. I felt like I hit most of the notes I was going for, which is unlike most nights. I don't know where we're playing tomorrow. I know it's in Florida though.

Julia ordered my wireless card so that I'll have internet in the van, and it's being sent to Luke's house in Alabama. So with that I will hopefully be able to update more often. I'm burning Haggard right now. I don't like the weather when it's this hot and sunny. Not to mention the humidity.

It's much easier to update Twitter when I'm touring. It's so quick, all I have to do is send a text to Twitter with the update and it posts. Constant brief blogging...so awesome.

Alright I'm done with this update.

South Carolina

I'm at Tanya's house in South Carolina making pasta right now. Last night's show was cool, it was in Wilmington North Carolina and everyone stood on the stage when Defeater and Energy played so that it was less awkward. We stayed at Garrett's house and he let me copy Children of the Corn 2, which he is actually in, and another movie that I can't remember the name of. We watched Wrong Turn 2 with Henry Rollins and that was hilarious. We played South Carolina tonight and we were not let down. My favorite place to play on tour. Tonight someone told me that they are getting "please heaven wash over me" tattooed on their collar bone. I hugged him immediately. I saw Eric holding a video camera so I think he got some of the set. I'll post it when it's up. The cops came and told us that without some certain license, we couldn't sell anything. So in our most popular spot on tour, we weren't allowed to sell anything. Fucking stupid. I don't really have anything else to update about right now. I need to pay attention to the pasta I'm cooking.

VEGAN FOR LIFE

Driving to Virginia from West Virginia right now, listening to the new Earth Crisis. Eric just told me that someone online said that Energy covering Guilty of Being White was stupid. I don't understand that. People cover the Bad Brains and praise them to no end, but they were openly homophobic in one of their songs. I don't even hate the Bad Brains because of that either, I just think that they were confused when they wrote that. I'm pretty sure they have even come forward and said that they were wrong.

I have personally been hated because of the color of my skin and have been harassed because of it. All that song is about is how you shouldn't feel bad about your skin color regardless of history. If people keep holding on to the bad things in the past that don't apply to life today, then nothing or no one will move forward. Clearly I believe that there is no superior race, that song is just an anti prejudice song. Some people just want to come across as being too politically correct and hate the wrong things. There is NOTHING more to the argument either by the way, it's exactly what I just said and that's that. The only thing that I am guilty of is being white, and that should not be something that someone feels guilty about. The same thing goes for black people and/or any other ethnicity/race. MOST of the times that we have covered that song, there was at least one black kid singing along, and they weren't doing it to be ironic, they were singing along with the idea of them being "guilty of being black", because it's all one in the same. Guilty of being white, guilty of being black, neither should feel any sense of guilt or shame. People will never understand it though. There will never be one final answer to the confusion behind us covering that song. There will always be confused people who don't know why they're angry, or what they're angry at who will come forward and say things without really considering the intentions behind the things they're angry at.

To take it a step further, when Slayer covered Guilty of Being White on Undisputed Attitude and change "white" to "right" at the end of the song, I don't necessarily believe that they meant that it's "right to be white". I have no proof behind my theory on Slayer's modifications of the lyrics, but I believe that they knew they would get shit for covering it and just wanted to take the controversy a step further. I believe that by "right" they meant that they were right in singing about the issue at hand. I don't believe that they meant that as being racist in any way. That's just my opinion on THEIR cover of it.

Ian Mackaye even explained the meaning behind the song in American Hardcore. He also explained how he can't believe that anyone would take it as being racist. I'll just end this topic here because if after reading all of that, you still think it was "stupid" that we covered that song, then I just don't know what else to say to you.

Yikes, I accidentally posted that on the Energy blog at first. I don't want to stir up too much bullshit, which is why it's only on this blog, but if people want to quote me from this entry and/or on Energy's behalf, go for it. I wouldn't have said any of that if I didn't mean it anyway.
I'll try to update more after the show tonight.

West Virginia

Sorry I look so bad. It's a post-show picture, what do you expect?

03-19-09 on 12seconds.tv

I'm going to try to do those more often.

I wrote this during the drive today:

Last night's show in Philly was really good. It was a basement show and a lot of people sang along. It seems that this is the first tour where people are actually coming out to see us. The fact that people have been singing along every single night has me in a really good mood lately. We covered Guilty of Being White and I Turned Into A Martian. Nick from Charleston was there and we stayed at his house last night. He lives in PA now. His dog pissed all over Keith's blankets. I also got some Bob Dylan albums from Nick.

I'm pretty bored right now, we just stopped and I got some wafers for 71 cents. This girl Lindsay said she'd do make up for me whenever I want, whether it be for promo pics or a big show. I can't wait to take her up on that because she's really good. I want to do more theatric/dramatic things like that, stage props, things like that. I love it when bands do things like that.

I need to get in better shape too. I've been doing push ups every morning.


Post show:

The show tonight was really good. Every show has been awesome so far. The crowd reacted the best to 400. We're at Ben and Kate's house in West Virginia. We stayed here last time for a few days so it's good to revisit old memories, I just hope that the large crowd that's here doesn't stay over so that we can have more room to sleep. It's not that big of a deal. I don't really feel like updating too much right now. That's a big reason why I write my updates on the van rides during the day, because once the night comes, I'm generally too mentally exhausted to sit and write out a detailed description of the day.

Currently Listening to:

Yes

Sorry I haven't updated in a while. Since I left, I went on tour, am now on my 4th day of that. The first show in Holyoke was good except for the fact that half the people left before we played. We covered Guilty of Being White. I could barely finish the set because of how little exercise I've gotten in the last 2 months. Here is the flyer for that show:




And here is a video from that show:





The second show, Poughkeepsie New York was really cool. There was a bunch of people that knew the words to the songs. Here is the flyer for that show:



The following night was Long Island NY and it was awesome as well. Jason and his friends came out along with a bunch more people.

Group picture we took (Stolen from Jason's blog):


There were people singing along the whole time and I sweated my ass off playing. It was a great show. We stayed at Keith's 2 nights in a row and we are currently driving to New Jersey. We stopped at a record store before we left and I picked up the following things:




I'm at Mij's house now, the same place where we lost the guitars during the Debaser/Beartrap tour. The show tonight was really cool, my brother taped it, so here it is:











Here's the flyer for the Long Island show:



And here's the video:



Energy @ VP South 3/17/09 from Chris Albin on Vimeo.



We only have a 1 hour drive to Philly tomorrow, so we are hitting up Gavinda's (Spelling?) before the show. It's 3:21 AM and I don't feel like typing any more.

Benny Binoculars

Today was pretty good, I woke up and went to Grasshopper, yes again, with Julia and Eric. Today was the first time that they guessed our orders, so I guess that makes us regulars. Afterward, I dropped Julia off at home and Eric and I went to Mike's house. Sean was over and I started recording some vocals for his song. It took me forever just to do one line, as usual, and it didn't even get finished. We just sat around at Mike's from 11 or so until 4:30 am, uneventful, but a good night.

Trent Reznor posted this on his Twitter today: "You know that feeling you get when somebody embarrasses themselves so badly YOU feel uncomfortable? Heard Chris Cornell's record? Jesus."

I burst into laughter the second I read that. It must be awesome to be that famous and have your hilariously vicious opinions be heard by thousands, if not millions, but in this case thousands.

Owen Black IM'd me a few hours ago. He told me that he is taking singing lessons right now and that he reads my blog from time to time. I told him that I am considering taking lessons as well. We talked for a bit about music and exchanged phone numbers because he said that he's going to try to make it out to our Poughkeepsie show on Monday.

I really am considering taking lessons because today at Mike's I had minimal to zero control of my voice and it actually made me feel bad about myself. On the other hand though, there is something really satisfying about the fact that I am "self-taught" or whatever, even though I learned a lot from Mike, so I'm technically not self taught. As you can see I'm still trying to decide, but the only thing keeping me from doing it is the fact that I won't be able to say "I've never taken singing lessons" ever again. That and money. The first one isn't a good reason at all though, it only means that I'm holding myself back from reaching my full potential just so that I can say I did it on my own. Whatever, chances are I'll never get around to it, I'd like to though.

I got my package from Machete on Tuesday, it included my black vest(which fits perfectly), 2 Operation Ivy patches(they sent me an extra so I gave one to Eric), a handful of pins, and a grab bag that had a Ramones pin and patch, a U.S. Bombs wristband, a Day Of Contempt patch, and a Throwdown sticker. I will only be using the Ramones stuff from the grab bag. I found my Samhain shirt and cut it up for the back of the vest, which my Mom is going to sew for me (yes I know, how punk rock). I have to remember to mail out this Guns Up 7 inch that I sold on ebay.

In a little less than an hour I'll be heading to Julia's to pick her up, drive her brother and sister to school, and drop myself off at my house so that she can drive to work.

Oh and Joe sent me a song today that he labeled "I'm so fucking thirsty". He said it is the worst out of all the songs he has towards our new album. I disagree, I can think of a few of the songs he's done to which I'd prefer this one. I think it's actually really good.

I'm going to watch The Simpsons now.

A world full of Bania's

I am so bored right now, I woke up a little after midnight and there's nothing to do. I fell asleep when Julia was over, which I hate doing but when I crash I crash, and that's that. I am on no particular sleeping pattern, but I'd like it if I would get on somewhat of a normal one soon. I will soon enough actually, because of tour. Tour starts in a week. Aside from missing Julia, I could give a fuck about leaving. I won't miss a damn thing besides her, and maybe sitting here completely alone in my room playing records. I really really like The Pixies - Surfer Rosa a lot. I didn't think that I would because I generally can't get into "off sounding" indie music (if you know what I mean by that), but its unbelievable. I've been getting into a handful of new bands lately. And of course by new I mean old, but new to me.

I think I understand why people like to be the only people that like a certain band. It makes the music more personal to them, and they feel that the artist is directly speaking to them. I think that's fucking stupid. If people are ACTUALLY moved by music, then it doesn't matter. Another example of people not being able to figure their own feelings out for themselves. You aren't mad that a lot of other people like a band, you are mad because you think it trivializes your love for it, when in fact, nothing can change that. People will be moved by music, and people will pretend to be moved by music. That's that. Live inside your own head for ONCE. I am so mad at people right now because they are capable of so much more. I had (am still having) a long conversation with Mike about this. People just can't figure out how to perceive correctly, they don't even know who they are. People don't read to read, they read to be seen reading. People don't write to write, they write to be seen writing. People aren't in bands to make music, they are in bands to be seen as being in a band.

Mike brought up a hilarious, but sadly true point: I said "I learned most of what I know from music" he said "yea and look at the public school system's music "education"
they play songs from the fucking 30's and 40's and have all these big band instruments that were popular in the 30's and 40's
they pay like 1,000 bucks per saxophone or trumpet
they don't buy any guitars
basses
drum sets
and that FUCKS people up about music
it discourages so many people
they are like this shit sucks fuck this
yep seriously that's why the country is fucked
look at how dumb public schools make our citizens"

It's true. I remember getting scolded for bringing in Mellon Collie & The Infinite Sadness when they asked us to bring in a CD from home. I can't really remember much about that incident besides having her try and embarrass me in front of the class for it.

Speaking of class, I can't stand how everyone embraces the "outsider/loner/recluse" thing. I was actually laughed at sometimes, not popular in school, and the worst of them all, COMPLETELY IGNORED. I wasn't accepted by teachers either, they all hated my fucking guts, well 99 percent of them. Stop denying who you really are, it's not a bad thing. Who you really are will always be who you really are. Just embrace THAT. I'm sure there are plenty of ACTUAL problems in your life that you could sincerely write about instead of leaving that part of your mind locked. People DO have the potential to be creative, artistic, beautiful creatures, but their own closed minds won't allow for it.

I remember when I was in high school, I didn't do any work or homework. I barely passed. I only passed because everyone was coming down on me about it so hard and being young, I didn't realize that high school really doesn't matter (to those of us who didn't want to go to college). I didn't have any friends at all in ANY of my classes. Every second in class was spent analyzing my own body language, and making sure that it conveyed that I didn't want to be talked to, because every time I'd make eye contact with someone they'd ask "why don't you talk" or "are you ok" or they'd make fun of me, passively though, of course. It's not fun being an ACTUAL outsider. In the scene that my band is in though, I am an outsider amongst "outsiders". I look and act different, so I'm rejected...by "rejects". For a place that's supposed to be open to new ideas and radical beliefs, it sure is filled with a bunch of sheep.

I went to Grasshopper with Julia today. We go there quite a bit now. It was awesome as usual, I just wish that I didn't pass out almost immediately after.


Bill

It's as it should be, it's as it is written.

Quick update before I go to bed (yes at 9am). Nothing that new has happened lately. I have been writing some new Children of the Night songs with Mike the past few days. Today I got Nirvana - Bleach on vinl, and Season one of The Simpsons (yeah I know, before it was good). Julia stayed over, but I had only been conscious for a few hours before she went to bed, so I went to Mike's and hung out and worked on a new song. Matt came over around 5am and I laughed a lot. I got back here this morning and hung out with Julia for a bit before she went to work. I burned her a couple Blink 182 CDs and they won't play in the car, I feel bad.

I started writing a song last Autumn, and it's one of my favorite things that I've ever written. It was intended to be a 10 second song, but everyone in the band liked the vocal melody so much that they said we shouldn't waste it on a 10 second song. The song has 1 line - 11 words, and is around 20 seconds long, including the ringout at the end. I'm trying to make it longer, but I'm having a hard time with the lyrics. I wrote the song after watching Children of the Corn, four consecutive times in one day.

Yesterday, well today to me seeing as I'm still conscious from when it happened, I got a wrap from Papa Gino's and some kids called me a freak as I was walking away. I hate everyone. I was wearing a jacket with no make-up on, no tattoos showing, I was just some kid dressed in black with long hair - that's it. Freak. I was very polite to the people behind the counter, and just wanted to go about my business. Whatever. This is why I hate going outside. This is why I love shutting myself off from everyone unless it's to create music. I woke up at 7pm yesterday, which means I have now been up for 14 hours. I have to sleep and then wake up around 3:30 to get ready to go to dinner with my Dad at 4:30.

I don't have any real reason, besides laziness, why I haven't updated this in a few days. I seem to be the most motivated/creative when I'm about an hour or 2 away from falling asleep. I was thinking today about how when people idolize, or look up to a person, or a group of people/band/etc, they support everything they say/do. I find it strange that most people can't realize that they can like someone, and not agree with 100 percent of their ideology. No two people think exactly alike, and it's very, very rare that you'll find another person whom you agree with on EVERYTHING, if you find them at all. I think it's just that people are obssessed, fixated on the idea of a one-shot solution to all of their problems: this formula = happiness. It will never be that easy. There is no single set of rules or ideas that will solve every problem, and there never will be. I was thinking about this because I remembered something I heard about Steve Albini. Now, I agree with him that an engineer does not DESERVE points/royalites on the records that they record, but I don't think it's wrong if they take a point on the record because the point will otherwise go to waste (from what I understand, I could be wrong though). For all I know, Albini may also agree with that way of thinking, but assuming he doesn't, it's OK that I have a different opinion on that matter, and that I am still a fan of his. He could even personally hate my guts for some reason, but that wouldn't change the fact that I am a fan. People just need to realize that they have forgotten how to perceive correctly, take a step back, assess things with pure intentions, not letting anything cloud their minds with bullshit, and TRULY think for themselves.

It's time to go to sleep now. I hope I dream forever and never wake up.

Birthday wrap-up

I woke up today and Julia and I went to Newbury Comics and then to the mall. At Newbury Comics I got The Pixies - Surfer Rosa, and Minor Threat - S/T on vinyl. I also got season 6 of The Simpsons. At the mall, Julia and I got our eyebrows threaded (Can you tell?) After that, we went to Grasshopper which was awesome as usual. We went home after that and watched The Simpsons. She fell asleep and I just never woke her up so she's still here. My mom gave me 100 dollars for my birthday so I ordered that vest that I wanted with some of the money. I am pretty sure that once I find my Samhain - November Coming Fire shirt, I'm going to cut it up and turn it into a back patch for the vest, I think I left it in the van.

I'm testing out some DVD to .avi/.mpg converter, I'm not sure if it's going to work or not, I hope it does. I'm pretty bored right now, as usual. I'm also pretty cold too, again, as usual. I found a cool Nerve Agents patch and 2 Nerve Agents pins, along with 3 Common Rider pins that I will put on my vest. Denim vest with vinyl pants? Hmmm. I am wondering if that will go well together or not.

When I go to California I want to get a picture of me doing this in this exact same spot:



Currently listening to:

24 is the highest number...

Me and Julia cleaned my room today and put up some posters:




I wish I had a few more. Looks like for now, AFI will be the poster in all of my blog entry pics.

Julia stayed until shortly after midnight so that she could wish me a happy birthday. I am in my mid-twenties now, that's scary.



I hope that I stay living here for a while. Its a good location and I have my own space to be alone. I'll probably wake up tomorrow just in time for when Julia comes home from work, which will be nice. It snowed today and I had to shovel on very little sleep, it sucked. I have the new Friday the 13th on DVD, I liked it a lot. I also burned the Evil Dead trilogy to DVD, as well as Children of the Corn and House of a Thousand Corpses. I'm on a bit of a horror binge as of late. I'm downloading Prince of Darkness right now, along with The Devil's Rejects.

I'm pretty bored right now. I can't think of anything to write about really. I hope that someone buys my stuff on ebay so I can order that vest. I always say this, and I'll say it again, people look at me like I have 10 heads anyway, so I might as well wear exactly what I want, and look exactly how I want as often as I can. A lot of the time, due to social anxiety or whatever, I will tone down my look if I know that I'm going to a store or something, just so that I don't have the entire place staring at me, but it never fails to happen anyway so fuck it.

I just made an Amy's burger and I'm drinking apple cider from Whole Foods. Its pretty cold outside of my room, but surprisingly warm inside of it. I think it may have something to do with the candle I have burning in here. Julia got it for me, its a Cinnamon & Sugar scented Yankee Candle.

Now that I think of it, I should probably leave my phone on when I'm asleep tonight so that when my Dad calls to wish me a happy birthday, I will wake up.

I'm trying to figure out a way to play my turntable through my MacBook. I have computer speakers that sound pretty good hooked up to my MacBook for when I play music through iTunes, but it just sucks having to unplug them and hook them up to my turntable just to listen to my records. I know I have an extra set of speakers in storage, but I'd rather just be able to play everything through one set of speakers without having to constantly switch things around.

I'm done.

$$$

Please buy these from me:

Ambitions Shirt



Guns Up 7"


http://shop.ebay.com/merchant/jasontankerley

I need money so I can buy this:



Its only 15 bucks, but its 15 bucks that I don't have =(