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Tuesday, September 30, 2008
Friday, August 8, 2008
Friday, August 8th, 2008
Well I leave for tour any minute now. I'm pretty depressed about it. Its the last time me and Julia with have an apartement, a home, for a while. All of our stuff is going into storage, our TV our couches, our tables, our computer, our decorations, our shelves....I'm very sad about it all. I don't handle losing things that have sentimental value very well, I never have. Even when I was younger I'd spend weeks crying to the thought of Christmas being over, or my annual trip to maine being over, or having to throw something away that meant a lot to me. Its not a bad thing really I guess it just shows that I'm very emotional, and I'd rather be over emotional, than be someone who can't express themselves.
At least I get to keep my cat. That was the biggest thing that would have broken my heart. I love that cat so much. So me being upset is 100 percent sentimental. I will have my cat, my girlfriend, all the items that were inside will be in storage, its just KNOWING I can't go back to me and Julias home, ever again that makes me want to die.
Also, I am going to be homeless when I come back from tour. Julia is living with her mom, but ill have nowhere to live. I've been living like this for most of my teenage years, so its not unfamiliar, but I was also becoming used to coming home to the comfort of my nice apartment with my awesome girlfriend, and being alone. We won't have any alone time any more, then again it'll be like back when we were first together, it could be exciting, but probably will just be depressing.
This is it I'm walking out of Me and Julia's apartment for the last time...
Aug. 8th, 2008
Well I leave for tour any minute now. I'm pretty depressed about it. Its the last time me and Julia with have an apartement, a home, for a while. All of our stuff is going into storage, our TV our couches, our tables, our computer, our decorations, our shelves....I'm very sad about it all. I don't handle losing things that have sentimental value very well, I never have. Even when I was younger I'd spend weeks crying to the thought of Christmas being over, or my annual trip to maine being over, or having to throw something away that meant a lot to me. Its not a bad thing really I guess it just shows that I'm very emotional, and I'd rather be over emotional, than be someone who can't express themselves.
At least I get to keep my cat. That was the biggest thing that would have broken my heart. I love that cat so much. So me being upset is 100 percent sentimental. I will have my cat, my girlfriend, all the items that were inside will be in storage, its just KNOWING I can't go back to me and Julias home, ever again that makes me want to die.
Also, I am going to be homeless when I come back from tour. Julia is living with her mom, but ill have nowhere to live. I've been living like this for most of my teenage years, so its not unfamiliar, but I was also becoming used to coming home to the comfort of my nice apartment with my awesome girlfriend, and being alone. We won't have any alone time any more, then again it'll be like back when we were first together, it could be exciting, but probably will just be depressing.
This is it I'm walking out of Me and Julia's apartment for the last time...
At least I get to keep my cat. That was the biggest thing that would have broken my heart. I love that cat so much. So me being upset is 100 percent sentimental. I will have my cat, my girlfriend, all the items that were inside will be in storage, its just KNOWING I can't go back to me and Julias home, ever again that makes me want to die.
Also, I am going to be homeless when I come back from tour. Julia is living with her mom, but ill have nowhere to live. I've been living like this for most of my teenage years, so its not unfamiliar, but I was also becoming used to coming home to the comfort of my nice apartment with my awesome girlfriend, and being alone. We won't have any alone time any more, then again it'll be like back when we were first together, it could be exciting, but probably will just be depressing.
This is it I'm walking out of Me and Julia's apartment for the last time...
Tuesday, August 5, 2008
Wednesday, July 2, 2008
Jul. 2nd, 2008
I'm so tired. So much band stuff from recording, to touring blah blah blah. I don't even feel like I'm fully conscious. I can't really think straight. They're getting the cd mastered tomorrow. should be exciting to hear. I just hope there's no money confusion or anything, which there probably will be, or any other dumb shit for that matter.
I feel like I haven't got an actual GOOD night of sleep in well over a month. I wake up with my mind racing and feeling exhausted. When people talk to me I only catch like half of what they're saying no matter what.
Tomorrow's mastering, Thursday is show at Al's house/fireworks/party at Al's - Best night of the year. Then Friday(or Thursday night, who knows because I never know what the hell is ever going on with my bands immediate plans) we leave for our tour that will undoubtedly be a money wasting disaster. 75 bucks a night. over 100 to fill the gas tank. That's all I'm even going to say.
The guy at the T-Mobile store told me I'd have my sidekick in time for Friday. I'm calling it now that I won't have it.
I got my knuckles tattooed today, Rose Glen. I didn't get it how everyone does because the way everyone gets it makes it look like they have hand tattoos, and I don't like hand tattoos, so I just got it thin in cursive. I like it a lot, it's just not much to look at, just words, no shading or anything, just script. I'm glad I got it, it will constantly remind me of the best times of my life spent at Al's house with all my best friends, being total aliens to the rest of the world. Not my favorite tattoo because well, it's not really art,and that's why I get tattoos, but it probably means the most to me out of all my tattoos. It's also my first like "friendship" tattoo. Not like everyones "FRIENDSHIPS" that they get which are really general, only a certain number of people could get rose glen tattoos. So far it's: Josh, Bubby, Eric, Roe, Me, TT. Hopefully more to come.
I'm fucking exhausted.
I feel like I haven't got an actual GOOD night of sleep in well over a month. I wake up with my mind racing and feeling exhausted. When people talk to me I only catch like half of what they're saying no matter what.
Tomorrow's mastering, Thursday is show at Al's house/fireworks/party at Al's - Best night of the year. Then Friday(or Thursday night, who knows because I never know what the hell is ever going on with my bands immediate plans) we leave for our tour that will undoubtedly be a money wasting disaster. 75 bucks a night. over 100 to fill the gas tank. That's all I'm even going to say.
The guy at the T-Mobile store told me I'd have my sidekick in time for Friday. I'm calling it now that I won't have it.
I got my knuckles tattooed today, Rose Glen. I didn't get it how everyone does because the way everyone gets it makes it look like they have hand tattoos, and I don't like hand tattoos, so I just got it thin in cursive. I like it a lot, it's just not much to look at, just words, no shading or anything, just script. I'm glad I got it, it will constantly remind me of the best times of my life spent at Al's house with all my best friends, being total aliens to the rest of the world. Not my favorite tattoo because well, it's not really art,and that's why I get tattoos, but it probably means the most to me out of all my tattoos. It's also my first like "friendship" tattoo. Not like everyones "FRIENDSHIPS" that they get which are really general, only a certain number of people could get rose glen tattoos. So far it's: Josh, Bubby, Eric, Roe, Me, TT. Hopefully more to come.
I'm fucking exhausted.
Friday, June 27, 2008
Jun. 27th, 2008
I finally finished recording vocals today. I'm so glad that's over with, but at the same time I can't wait to write new songs already and look forward to a new record. This is how I felt when we recorded our EP too. This will probably be a reoccurring thing that will go along with the completion of every record we do.
I've been thinking about this a lot lately: I don't think I'll ever be happy with the stage I'm at with songwriting. I will like songs we write, I will probably always tell myself that I will eventually do better. I feel as if writing music is something that is never fully mastered. It's all about personal improvement and learning. I still feel like I'm learning how to write songs. If you get to the point where you think everything you do is great, then that's when you start to pump out soulless garbage. I will always be critical of everything I do.
Also, art is not a contest. I see so many bands and even fans of music really going out of their way to let everyone else know that they are well read/intellectual/deep/artistic/interest
The Smashing Pumpkins embody everything I would like my band to become. They have so many different style songs that no new material would really make anyone go "Wait, THIS is the smashing pumpkins???? this isn't right" They have songs where it's just Billy on guitar and vocals, songs like Disarm, aggressive songs like JellyBelly, Bullet with Butterfly wings, songs like Ava Adore using solely synthetic beats, Songs like tonight tonight, songs like The Everlasting Gaze that are down tuned, brutal songs.
That's just my ultimate goal is to always be pushing the band in different directions and always be reinventing our sound so that anyone that knows us will never say "HUH????" to anything we do, yet at the same time having it still sound like "Us". So that the natural progression actually becomes a part of "our sound".
I'm rambling, well it's not like anyone's really reading this anyways because Blogs are where it's at nowadays as far as, typing your thoughts down so that people can publicly read them in a journal-like fashion goes....
It's like 5:30 am, I have a show tonight, I should sleep.
I've been thinking about this a lot lately: I don't think I'll ever be happy with the stage I'm at with songwriting. I will like songs we write, I will probably always tell myself that I will eventually do better. I feel as if writing music is something that is never fully mastered. It's all about personal improvement and learning. I still feel like I'm learning how to write songs. If you get to the point where you think everything you do is great, then that's when you start to pump out soulless garbage. I will always be critical of everything I do.
Also, art is not a contest. I see so many bands and even fans of music really going out of their way to let everyone else know that they are well read/intellectual/deep/artistic/interest
The Smashing Pumpkins embody everything I would like my band to become. They have so many different style songs that no new material would really make anyone go "Wait, THIS is the smashing pumpkins???? this isn't right" They have songs where it's just Billy on guitar and vocals, songs like Disarm, aggressive songs like JellyBelly, Bullet with Butterfly wings, songs like Ava Adore using solely synthetic beats, Songs like tonight tonight, songs like The Everlasting Gaze that are down tuned, brutal songs.
That's just my ultimate goal is to always be pushing the band in different directions and always be reinventing our sound so that anyone that knows us will never say "HUH????" to anything we do, yet at the same time having it still sound like "Us". So that the natural progression actually becomes a part of "our sound".
I'm rambling, well it's not like anyone's really reading this anyways because Blogs are where it's at nowadays as far as, typing your thoughts down so that people can publicly read them in a journal-like fashion goes....
It's like 5:30 am, I have a show tonight, I should sleep.
Friday, May 30, 2008
May. 30th, 2008
im very happy with how our cd sounds so far. the drums sound huge, awesome snare sound. we recorded the drums analog and pasted them into pro tools to give it a polished sound but at the same time, making the drums sound REAL. justin's playing on this record is incredible.
conor should be finishing up bass as im typing this, bass sounds really good, reminds me of the black sails bass sound. we spent longer than we usually do on bass, making sure the playing was absolutely flawless.
after conor finishes, joe will be spending the rest of the day figuring out all of the guitar tones/sounds he will be using throughout the album.
sat.tomorrow, we have a show in CT(i think?) . should be fun to play live again, always is.
sunday is an off day.
monday we head back to chris currans and joe will start recording guitars and we will be doing that all week id assume. julia will be coming down tuesday cus she has the day off =)
i think the following week i will be tracking vocals, though there's been talk of me doing some vocals at night during the days joe is recording guitars. either way, im excited.
the vocals should come out perfect seeing as mike rendini is producing. im just worried about writing. although, i did get quite a bit of writing done, in the studio while conor was doing bass. i just have one full song of lyrics to do, and 2 lines in another song. so i guess im not THAT behind. it will all work out awesome so im not worried.
i can't wait for this cd to be in stores. i will be so proud.
ep comes first, i think its going to be called the "Race The Sun" EP. it's so exciting to have 2 releases ahead of me from one recording session. it will have an "exclusive to the ep" cover of the ramones cover of the beach boys cover of Bobby Freeman's "do you wanna dance" its a good song =)
it will just be good to know im actually proud of the recording that im promoting.
conor should be finishing up bass as im typing this, bass sounds really good, reminds me of the black sails bass sound. we spent longer than we usually do on bass, making sure the playing was absolutely flawless.
after conor finishes, joe will be spending the rest of the day figuring out all of the guitar tones/sounds he will be using throughout the album.
sat.tomorrow, we have a show in CT(i think?) . should be fun to play live again, always is.
sunday is an off day.
monday we head back to chris currans and joe will start recording guitars and we will be doing that all week id assume. julia will be coming down tuesday cus she has the day off =)
i think the following week i will be tracking vocals, though there's been talk of me doing some vocals at night during the days joe is recording guitars. either way, im excited.
the vocals should come out perfect seeing as mike rendini is producing. im just worried about writing. although, i did get quite a bit of writing done, in the studio while conor was doing bass. i just have one full song of lyrics to do, and 2 lines in another song. so i guess im not THAT behind. it will all work out awesome so im not worried.
i can't wait for this cd to be in stores. i will be so proud.
ep comes first, i think its going to be called the "Race The Sun" EP. it's so exciting to have 2 releases ahead of me from one recording session. it will have an "exclusive to the ep" cover of the ramones cover of the beach boys cover of Bobby Freeman's "do you wanna dance" its a good song =)
it will just be good to know im actually proud of the recording that im promoting.
Sunday, May 11, 2008
May. 11th, 2008
Why am I the only person on earth that has a brain. People actually wonder why I don't like leaving my apartment. There's a reason I don't hang out with you. Think about that. THERE IS A REASON I DO NOT HANG OUT WITH YOU, yes YOU the reader. haha and watch, no one will comment either cus I made it too awkward. And now that I think of it just so you don't piss me off by being a wise ass and commenting just to spite me, I'm disabling comments for this one post.
But yeah. I don't hang out with you for one reason or another. Some people just because I don't know you maybe? but mostly because I know, that at some point down the line, I will disagree with something about you or do/say/believe/ in so much, that it will piss me off to no end.
During these last 3 days I've never wanted to just stop existing more in my life. Well, not in my life, but as far as the last few years go, it's been the worst. I am the only person I know that makes intelligent decisions. I am never happy. EVER. Why is it that when I break things down for people, they can't seem to bring up any good points to prove me wrong, BUT STILL manage to think they are right, and go about whatever it is they were doing that we were arguing about. Oh that's right because they are idiots. I hate every fucking person I see. I am so full of rage today. I was screaming at the top of my lungs punching shit in my apartment. I had no control over it. As if last night wasn't difficult enough for me to get through. Not talking about the show. Show was good. I'm just going to leave it at that.
There are so many things pissing me off in life right now I feel like my head is going to explode. Why can't people just see a problem, asses it, and solve it. This of course roots back to the obvious "why does this problem exist in the first place? oh that's right YOU'RE A DUMBASS YOU FUCKING IDIOT" No matter what, if you think this is about it, it either could be or couldn't be it's just such a generalization because of how many DIFFERENT things are pissing me off.
I am going to have a nervous breakdown, I am pretty sure I had one last night. and then again today. *EDIT* I just looked it up, yes I did, 2 nervous breakdowns in 24 hours. Actually 3. I am just losing it at the drop of a fucking hat I can't control myself anymore. Whether it be in a fit of furious rage and anger, or just me freaking out in other ways that I won't go into. I don't give a shit what you think of me when you read this. You're the same way. You hide shit all on the inside and wouldn't DARE let anyone else see you in your moments of weakness, or even god forbid.....SEE YOU SHOW REAL HUMAN EMOTION!!!!!!!
FUCK YOU - god dammit I am so mad right now. Don't fucking ask me what this is all about either, I'm just writing this to get it off my mind a little so I don't grind my teeth down the the nerves in my sleep. Everything pisses me off. Every thing about ever person I see.
I went to Al's tonight and got my mind off of things for at least a little bit, but of course even got a little stressed there too. I just can't stop. I wish I could go to sleep forever. I guess I could if I wanted to. Wouldn't it be nice if when you died, it's just like dreaming forever. I'm sure there would still be nightmares actually. Yeah now that I think of it that would suck because all I have is nightmares.
All I do is as Julia puts it "wax philosophical" all day long. I wouldn't do this if everything just made sense. But every single thing that everyone does, doesn't. I know I sound redundant to you, but you ARE a moron to me.
I fear death so much but maybe it wouldn't be so bad. All this stupid bullshit would just cease. OH MAN THAT SOUNDS AWFUL! wouldn't want to have to go a whole day without being aggravated at something someone else did that's dumb, that you would have done a million times better.
I FEEL YOUR FEAR BURNING INTO MY NECK, AS I RUN THIS GAUNTLET OF EYES, THIS GAUNTLET OF LIES.
But yeah. I don't hang out with you for one reason or another. Some people just because I don't know you maybe? but mostly because I know, that at some point down the line, I will disagree with something about you or do/say/believe/ in so much, that it will piss me off to no end.
During these last 3 days I've never wanted to just stop existing more in my life. Well, not in my life, but as far as the last few years go, it's been the worst. I am the only person I know that makes intelligent decisions. I am never happy. EVER. Why is it that when I break things down for people, they can't seem to bring up any good points to prove me wrong, BUT STILL manage to think they are right, and go about whatever it is they were doing that we were arguing about. Oh that's right because they are idiots. I hate every fucking person I see. I am so full of rage today. I was screaming at the top of my lungs punching shit in my apartment. I had no control over it. As if last night wasn't difficult enough for me to get through. Not talking about the show. Show was good. I'm just going to leave it at that.
There are so many things pissing me off in life right now I feel like my head is going to explode. Why can't people just see a problem, asses it, and solve it. This of course roots back to the obvious "why does this problem exist in the first place? oh that's right YOU'RE A DUMBASS YOU FUCKING IDIOT" No matter what, if you think this is about it, it either could be or couldn't be it's just such a generalization because of how many DIFFERENT things are pissing me off.
I am going to have a nervous breakdown, I am pretty sure I had one last night. and then again today. *EDIT* I just looked it up, yes I did, 2 nervous breakdowns in 24 hours. Actually 3. I am just losing it at the drop of a fucking hat I can't control myself anymore. Whether it be in a fit of furious rage and anger, or just me freaking out in other ways that I won't go into. I don't give a shit what you think of me when you read this. You're the same way. You hide shit all on the inside and wouldn't DARE let anyone else see you in your moments of weakness, or even god forbid.....SEE YOU SHOW REAL HUMAN EMOTION!!!!!!!
FUCK YOU - god dammit I am so mad right now. Don't fucking ask me what this is all about either, I'm just writing this to get it off my mind a little so I don't grind my teeth down the the nerves in my sleep. Everything pisses me off. Every thing about ever person I see.
I went to Al's tonight and got my mind off of things for at least a little bit, but of course even got a little stressed there too. I just can't stop. I wish I could go to sleep forever. I guess I could if I wanted to. Wouldn't it be nice if when you died, it's just like dreaming forever. I'm sure there would still be nightmares actually. Yeah now that I think of it that would suck because all I have is nightmares.
All I do is as Julia puts it "wax philosophical" all day long. I wouldn't do this if everything just made sense. But every single thing that everyone does, doesn't. I know I sound redundant to you, but you ARE a moron to me.
I fear death so much but maybe it wouldn't be so bad. All this stupid bullshit would just cease. OH MAN THAT SOUNDS AWFUL! wouldn't want to have to go a whole day without being aggravated at something someone else did that's dumb, that you would have done a million times better.
I FEEL YOUR FEAR BURNING INTO MY NECK, AS I RUN THIS GAUNTLET OF EYES, THIS GAUNTLET OF LIES.
Thursday, May 8, 2008
May. 8th, 2008
I am only months away from being away from home longer than I'd ever want to be, but I am spending each night that I'm gone doing exactly what I want to be doing. Doesn't sound like it makes any sense does it. I've got like 3 songs to write (roughly, melodies for one song are done just have to do lyrics, and got chorus melodies for the other 2) I won't be actually tracking my vocals for a while so I have time, but I try and jot down ideas every night. Our record is going to sound so good. Justin is playing the drums and recording at Q-Division Studios (In the big room for the price of the small room, so I'm told) so it will sound incredible, Joe and Conor play flawlessly in the studio, and Mike Rendini will be making me not sound like a total dumbass. That's all I can ask. Then we go on a real tour with promised money each night, and promised food money each night, with popular bands headlining.
I have to go to practice I'll edit this later.
I have to go to practice I'll edit this later.
Wednesday, April 16, 2008
Apr. 16th, 2008
a message from a band to the Energy myspace:
Hey Energy !! Very jobs!! Very punch!! We are VENIAL from the forest Amozonia, fuckin brazillian band!! born the forest! how are??
Hey Energy !! Very jobs!! Very punch!! We are VENIAL from the forest Amozonia, fuckin brazillian band!! born the forest! how are??
Wednesday, April 2, 2008
Friday, March 28, 2008
Mar. 28th, 2008
People don't listen to bands unless a record label tells them it's ok. What would happen if every label in the world went under, and every band released everything for free online and relied on shows and merch sales to make their money? Well it would be basically the same way it is now because thats what bands REALLY make their money on, except people would have to actually decide for themselves what they want to like. What a concept huh?
Just a thought. I'm not boycotting labels just yet, because I believe that in this digital age, they will be obsolete eventually anyways. So while they AREN'T obsolete, I'm going to abide and do what it takes to get more popular in this day and age. Whatever.
Also, speaking of "the digital age" that we live in, I believe, (to a certain extent, for those of you who will take what I'm saying the wrong way, because that ALWAYS FUCKING HAPPENS, no one can just realize that everything I'm saying is with the best of intentions.) I believe that adding 500 people a day on myspace or however many people, is far more effective than doing DIY tours getting no food, hardly any exposure, driving for hours and hours and hours a day, and playing in front of 1 to 5 kids that knew you ahead of time, and exposing yourself to the other 20 in the room, 5 of which might like you enough to THINK about buying something, and MAYBE they will. I like playing in front of people, and I like playing live a LOT, but it just seems like a huge fucking waste of time traveling and touring like THAT. If you're playing with a band that will get like 300 to 500 people in a room each night at least, then that's a different story in my eyes. But that's not the case for me right now, so until that happens I will always see every small tour as pointless. If I know that 20 kids are gonna be into us in a small room I'll always be glad to play, but that's just not the case, that'll happen like once each tour, and it's cool and everything, but not worth the pain in the ass. If I'm going to be traveling like that, I want to be gaining as many fans as possible. I will never think that by continuously doing tours where we play in front of 30 kids each night who just awkwardly stand there to be polite and clap after each song to be polite is worth it. Sorry, call me an asshole, I just can't see how anyone would want to do that over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over. Yes I typed all those, no copy paste, just to emphasize my point.
Even if we somehow got so big that we had to play places like the Avalon or something, I'd always do secret shows, hell, even secret TOURS, where we played under a disguised name and played for like 500 kids. But right now, we don't have more than 1 to 5 people anywhere we go, that give enough of a shit, and you know what, I have to fucking EAT FOOD when I'm out doing this, and that little of a turnout isn't gonna feed me.
I honestly don't think I'm being negative, I think if anything I'm being positive by thinking these things. I just think I look into things a lot more than most people do, because no one else really talks about this stuff do they? No they don't. Not around me at least. I come across as being a negative person a lot of the time, but I really don't think I am. I'm just ANGRY, and not complacent or passive about the shit I'm directly exposed to. HOW CAN YOU BLAME ME FOR THAT?
I just don't see how everyone can just keep all their opinions to themselves all the time, mine just burst out of me. I can't keep them in. Sorry. That's not going to change.
Please feel free to comment, debate, argue, call me, IM me, or god forbid - BRING UP TO ME IN PERSON whatever in regards to things that you might disagree with. I shouldn't be someone who it isn't easy to confront about this stuff, it's not like I'd just flip out or smash you in the face with something. I like to talk about things. I would LIKE TO BE PROVEN WRONG about all the stuff I said in my entry, cus that would mean I wouldn't feel like I'm wasting my time if I actually believed I wasn't. Get it? I'll never know if you do.
On a different note, I'm not very "old fashioned" I realized today. I don't really care about instilling "classic" values in anything really. If something doesn't make sense to me, I'm not gonna do it. Period. I love hearing about any guy doing typical girl things, and any girl doing typical guy things, I think asking permission from someones parents to marry them is dumb, I think honoring someones dying wish even though you completely disagree with the morale behind it is dumb, I think people who are against gay marriage because they want to instill traditional moral values in America are dumb, I like when people are comfortable with every aspect of who they are,I like it when ANYONE truly makes an effort to be individualistic.
I just wish I could say all these things to people in real life without it being terribly evident that they don't want to listen to me.
On a non philosophical note though:
Today I woke up and did nothing. Well I did some things, I wrote some music, I ate some food, I looked for my keys that I FUCKING lost, I watched TV, but didn't really "do" anything.
I wish I had money, I'd obviously get a lot of tattoos, but I really want to start getting more of the clothes I want. I really really want to start experimenting with different styles of clothes and stuff, but I can't without money. Everyone I know looks the same, no offense but for the most part it's true, I don't really have a problem with that though. I want to dress so outrageously that it pisses people off, even people I know. It's just funny to me that the way someone dresses or wears their hair, or wears their make-up(or wears make-up period) gets tattoos, does or doesn't shave body hair in certain areas that their sex is or isn't "supposed" to paints their nails, pierces themselves etc etc etc, can actually get people all worked up and angry. "wait, BOYS AREN'T SUPPOSED TO DO THAT" "wait, GIRLS AREN'T SUPPOSED TO DO THAT" I don't know it's just funny - in like a pathetic way though.
somehow that turned back into introspection and philosophy, I just can't fucking stop haha.
I need a job though for real, not only to help Julia out with all of OUR expenses, but so I can just GET things for once. Not having a job is really incredible, but I'm starting to think that maybe just MAYBE, working like 12 hours a week or something that won't make me want to kill myself every minute I'm awake(and sometimes when I'm sleeping too) might not be such a bad idea. I'd be able to afford a snack once in a while, maybe some cool clothes etc. It's just an income, so I could just save money.
I really don't want to type anymore. So that's the end of that.
Just a thought. I'm not boycotting labels just yet, because I believe that in this digital age, they will be obsolete eventually anyways. So while they AREN'T obsolete, I'm going to abide and do what it takes to get more popular in this day and age. Whatever.
Also, speaking of "the digital age" that we live in, I believe, (to a certain extent, for those of you who will take what I'm saying the wrong way, because that ALWAYS FUCKING HAPPENS, no one can just realize that everything I'm saying is with the best of intentions.) I believe that adding 500 people a day on myspace or however many people, is far more effective than doing DIY tours getting no food, hardly any exposure, driving for hours and hours and hours a day, and playing in front of 1 to 5 kids that knew you ahead of time, and exposing yourself to the other 20 in the room, 5 of which might like you enough to THINK about buying something, and MAYBE they will. I like playing in front of people, and I like playing live a LOT, but it just seems like a huge fucking waste of time traveling and touring like THAT. If you're playing with a band that will get like 300 to 500 people in a room each night at least, then that's a different story in my eyes. But that's not the case for me right now, so until that happens I will always see every small tour as pointless. If I know that 20 kids are gonna be into us in a small room I'll always be glad to play, but that's just not the case, that'll happen like once each tour, and it's cool and everything, but not worth the pain in the ass. If I'm going to be traveling like that, I want to be gaining as many fans as possible. I will never think that by continuously doing tours where we play in front of 30 kids each night who just awkwardly stand there to be polite and clap after each song to be polite is worth it. Sorry, call me an asshole, I just can't see how anyone would want to do that over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over. Yes I typed all those, no copy paste, just to emphasize my point.
Even if we somehow got so big that we had to play places like the Avalon or something, I'd always do secret shows, hell, even secret TOURS, where we played under a disguised name and played for like 500 kids. But right now, we don't have more than 1 to 5 people anywhere we go, that give enough of a shit, and you know what, I have to fucking EAT FOOD when I'm out doing this, and that little of a turnout isn't gonna feed me.
I honestly don't think I'm being negative, I think if anything I'm being positive by thinking these things. I just think I look into things a lot more than most people do, because no one else really talks about this stuff do they? No they don't. Not around me at least. I come across as being a negative person a lot of the time, but I really don't think I am. I'm just ANGRY, and not complacent or passive about the shit I'm directly exposed to. HOW CAN YOU BLAME ME FOR THAT?
I just don't see how everyone can just keep all their opinions to themselves all the time, mine just burst out of me. I can't keep them in. Sorry. That's not going to change.
Please feel free to comment, debate, argue, call me, IM me, or god forbid - BRING UP TO ME IN PERSON whatever in regards to things that you might disagree with. I shouldn't be someone who it isn't easy to confront about this stuff, it's not like I'd just flip out or smash you in the face with something. I like to talk about things. I would LIKE TO BE PROVEN WRONG about all the stuff I said in my entry, cus that would mean I wouldn't feel like I'm wasting my time if I actually believed I wasn't. Get it? I'll never know if you do.
On a different note, I'm not very "old fashioned" I realized today. I don't really care about instilling "classic" values in anything really. If something doesn't make sense to me, I'm not gonna do it. Period. I love hearing about any guy doing typical girl things, and any girl doing typical guy things, I think asking permission from someones parents to marry them is dumb, I think honoring someones dying wish even though you completely disagree with the morale behind it is dumb, I think people who are against gay marriage because they want to instill traditional moral values in America are dumb, I like when people are comfortable with every aspect of who they are,I like it when ANYONE truly makes an effort to be individualistic.
I just wish I could say all these things to people in real life without it being terribly evident that they don't want to listen to me.
On a non philosophical note though:
Today I woke up and did nothing. Well I did some things, I wrote some music, I ate some food, I looked for my keys that I FUCKING lost, I watched TV, but didn't really "do" anything.
I wish I had money, I'd obviously get a lot of tattoos, but I really want to start getting more of the clothes I want. I really really want to start experimenting with different styles of clothes and stuff, but I can't without money. Everyone I know looks the same, no offense but for the most part it's true, I don't really have a problem with that though. I want to dress so outrageously that it pisses people off, even people I know. It's just funny to me that the way someone dresses or wears their hair, or wears their make-up(or wears make-up period) gets tattoos, does or doesn't shave body hair in certain areas that their sex is or isn't "supposed" to paints their nails, pierces themselves etc etc etc, can actually get people all worked up and angry. "wait, BOYS AREN'T SUPPOSED TO DO THAT" "wait, GIRLS AREN'T SUPPOSED TO DO THAT" I don't know it's just funny - in like a pathetic way though.
somehow that turned back into introspection and philosophy, I just can't fucking stop haha.
I need a job though for real, not only to help Julia out with all of OUR expenses, but so I can just GET things for once. Not having a job is really incredible, but I'm starting to think that maybe just MAYBE, working like 12 hours a week or something that won't make me want to kill myself every minute I'm awake(and sometimes when I'm sleeping too) might not be such a bad idea. I'd be able to afford a snack once in a while, maybe some cool clothes etc. It's just an income, so I could just save money.
I really don't want to type anymore. So that's the end of that.
Friday, March 7, 2008
Mar. 7th, 2008
prob not getting that piercing cus of a lack of money. Might be getting tattooed tomorrow. Got ANOTHER Rollins dvd today. Went to Town Spa today, was thoroughly humiliated. Then saw zach wolf doug and mike at town spa AGAIN. talked to my cousin. I probably won't get tattooed tomorrow just because nothing ever works out right when it comes to this type of stuff. I almost definitely will make an entry tomorrow night saying I didn't get tattooed. Too many things piss me off. I wish I could write more often. I wish Jere came over tonight so I could have worked out because I absolutely can't stand being downstairs alone it scares the shit out of me.
Is there something wrong with me? what did I ever do wrong? There's apparently nothing wrong with you. So it HAS to be me.
Here they come, whether I like it or not. Here they come to loot this helpless store owners shelves, with his privately owned business. He keeps to himself and doesn't like trouble. He just wants to help provide for all the townspeople. He just wants to live his life peacefully. But they won't have that will they? Oh no they wont. Here they come.
HERE COMES THE INVASION
Is there something wrong with me? what did I ever do wrong? There's apparently nothing wrong with you. So it HAS to be me.
Here they come, whether I like it or not. Here they come to loot this helpless store owners shelves, with his privately owned business. He keeps to himself and doesn't like trouble. He just wants to help provide for all the townspeople. He just wants to live his life peacefully. But they won't have that will they? Oh no they wont. Here they come.
HERE COMES THE INVASION
Saturday, March 1, 2008
Mar. 1st, 2008: Earth Crisis
I just saw earth crisis, def amazing. there was a real lack of energy from the crowd though, but I was feeling it and I know ExC was so that's all that matters. their setlist was:
(a series of nature sounds mixed with machines-into the taxi driver quote "one day a real rain will come and wash all the scum off the streets")
Born from Pain
Stand By
Deliverance
No Allegiance
Forced March
Forged in the flames
New Ethic
Broken Foundation
Unseen Holocaust
End Begins
Wrath Of Sanity
All Out War
Killing Brain Cells
Cease To Exist
Gomorrah's Season Ends
The Order that Shall Be
Eden's Demise
Firestorm
Tuesday, February 5, 2008
Feb. 5th, 2008
I'm so tired, I didn't get much sleep last night or the night before, yet I'm still up at 3:16 am. I am getting so fat. I go to the gym every day, but I can't stop eating junk food. I need to stop. I will stop. We spent the day today at Chris Currans recording vocals for a new song. I like how it came out. If you want to hear it let me know and I'll let you listen. Sunday we are playing with Therefore I Am at a college. They draw a lot of people so hopefully that will be a good show. I talked to kris about making some new shirts for the show and he said he could do it, so hopefully he pulls through on that. Also, Julia is coming to my show and she hasn't seen us play in a long long long long time so that makes me happy =)
Thursday, January 31, 2008
Jan. 31st, 2008
today I woke up at like 5 or 5:30 and I missed band practice because of it. I had a million missed calls, which reminds me, I never called my dad back. I was supposed to get scrap metal with Matt, didn't happen. Worked out for a little bit, not as long as I should have, but I was lazy. Got a bunch of food. That's pretty cool. My life just isn't as fun as it used to be in any way. For the last few days I've felt just a little too tired to do anything I want/need to do. I am almost certain it's because my diet has consisted solely on Pasta for the last few days. Hopefully I can get tattooed this weekend. I have practice tomorrow I'm pretty sure. Hope I wake up in time for it. I was also supposed to clean the apartment and/or get scrap metal before Julia wakes up. She's waking up in like 40 minutes and I'm way too fucking tired to clean. So looks like I didn't pull through for her once again. I'm a douche bag. Maybe with all the food she bought, having something different for a change when I wake up tomorrow will give me the energy I need to get some things done. Jackass is on and it's hilarious. That's it.
Friday, January 25, 2008
Jan. 25th, 2008
Well it's around when I stopped posting yesterday. I won't make this too long.
Josh and Eric are sleeping over tonight for the show....tomorrow? tonight? whatever. Should be....interesting, it's at a high school. kind of weird.
Jere came over early today(1:30ish) woke me up, but I didn't mind. He hung out for a while then went to some thing. Hope he makes it to the show tomorrow.
Went food shopping with Julia when she got home from work, got lots of good stuff =) She's the best. Seriously I would just be a loser bum idiot without her supporting me. Well I guess since she is supporting ME, that makes me a loser bum idiot anyways....but you know what I mean. We've been together now for so long I can't imagine life without her. I don't usually like to talk about this kind of stuff usually I've just become uncomfortable with it through the years, but I'm tired so that's probably why I am. Who the hell else would put up with my nonsense? I still feel the same happiness I felt when we first started going out every time I see her. Hopefully money isn't too tight and it doesn't ruin our little vacation thing we had planned. I really should get a job to help out (at least pull my own weight) I'll probably get on that next week. We don't spend enough time with each other. Between her 2 jobs and my shows and stuff, I barely EVER see her, and when I do there's always people around and like I always say, the more people around, the less comfortable everyone is. Eh whatever, hopefully all this shit ends soon. I love you Julia
I really need to stop staying up this late. (for constructive reasons not cus I don't like it, cus I think it's awesome)
FUCK
Josh and Eric are sleeping over tonight for the show....tomorrow? tonight? whatever. Should be....interesting, it's at a high school. kind of weird.
Jere came over early today(1:30ish) woke me up, but I didn't mind. He hung out for a while then went to some thing. Hope he makes it to the show tomorrow.
Went food shopping with Julia when she got home from work, got lots of good stuff =) She's the best. Seriously I would just be a loser bum idiot without her supporting me. Well I guess since she is supporting ME, that makes me a loser bum idiot anyways....but you know what I mean. We've been together now for so long I can't imagine life without her. I don't usually like to talk about this kind of stuff usually I've just become uncomfortable with it through the years, but I'm tired so that's probably why I am. Who the hell else would put up with my nonsense? I still feel the same happiness I felt when we first started going out every time I see her. Hopefully money isn't too tight and it doesn't ruin our little vacation thing we had planned. I really should get a job to help out (at least pull my own weight) I'll probably get on that next week. We don't spend enough time with each other. Between her 2 jobs and my shows and stuff, I barely EVER see her, and when I do there's always people around and like I always say, the more people around, the less comfortable everyone is. Eh whatever, hopefully all this shit ends soon. I love you Julia
I really need to stop staying up this late. (for constructive reasons not cus I don't like it, cus I think it's awesome)
FUCK
Thursday, January 24, 2008
Jan 24, 2008: Feelin' Good
Well it's 4:42 AM and I am not even close to being tired. I have unintentionally become semi-nocturnal once again.
I hate writing this type of shit in livejournal because it makes me sound like I'm going into rehab or detox or something like "oh I'm doin' so good, so much progress is being made, I'VE GOT MY SHIT TOGETHER!!!" like the type of "who are you trying to convince....other people? or yourself?(both pathetic) Shit.....BUT, to simply document what's been going on the last week: I have been working out like crazy, and I am aiming to become truly "Part Animal/Part Machine". I can not WAIT for the next Energy show so I can beat the living SHIT out of myself on"stage". I crave the punishment. I feel so ALIVE when I do it to myself.
Clearly reading that Henry Rollins "Iron" article has gotten to me somewhat.
I can admit that, it's not a bad thing if there's a positive outcome. Just because you are stating what is true, doesn't mean you've proved some kind of point/won some type of argument(An argument clearly only going on in your head because you didn't say anything TO me).(Fuck anyone who doesn't like Family Guy SOLELY because South Park pointed out HOW they make their show. Yes we all know that it's totally random humor. Yes we know it rips off The Simpsons. Congratulations, you pointed out HOW it's fucking hilarious. That doesn't make it all of a sudden NOT FUNNY. Don't get me wrong, South Park is fucking hilarious too but come on.) I will beat you in any argument.
BUT YEAH.
Today I hung out with one of my oldest friends(not oldest like in age but oldest as in one of my first friends), Jere. He's doing pretty good, at least from what he says. He seems pretty well. Hopefully that continues. I invited him to our show this Friday(?) and I'm pretty sure he's going.
I really want to go into a certain topic, and I want to be really in-depth, but I shouldn't. It's just about old friends and how they disappoint me. What I choose not to write about, is how they're disappointing me. Please get better is all I will say. Please take a look around and stop.
I have band practice tomorrow(Today). I wish practicing was more exhilarating. I wish when we went through the set, it was as if we were playing live. I wish it was punishing. I wish I had to prepare for it mentally like a workout. It's different when we're learning new songs/new covers because it would be counter-productive to be flipping out while doing so - nothing would get done. But it can't be that way, because none of us have any jobs to afford a practice space, and we're lucky enough to have a guitarist with parents nice enough to let us be loud and obnoxious in their basement for approx. 4 - 8 hours a week.
As I'm typing this I'm realizing something. I like talking/typing. I like having my thoughts be conveyed. Not that anyone even reads this, but I just like knowing it's out there for people to read. Also, now that I think of it, anytime I'm with people, I basically do anything to express my opinion to them by conveniently manipulating any and all conversation to my liking. Like, even if the conversation doesn't call for any type of opinionated declarations of any sort, sure enough, I will let you know mine, through some weird way that I'll be able to explain how I branched it out, rooting back to what you were talking about.
I'm tired of not being able to be open with everyone. You know what I'm talking about. The awkwardness that exists between all people that doesn't allow them to be exactly how they are when they are all by themselves. I know I can't bare the awkwardness to make the change(at least not quite yet) and I know you can't. So in that, we are one in the same. We are both ourselves, but are afraid that the other will think things(good and/or bad) about the other.
I know that if I acted how I act when I am completely by myself, everyone would think very bad things, but you are the same. You do things that you'd be embarrassed to do in front of anyone but yourself. Why do we put ourselves through this torture all day, every day of our lives? I can't answer that. I love being totally and completely MYSELF so much, that THAT'S why I love being alone so much. That's it. THAT'S IT! I just really have fallen in love with how amazing and liberating it feels to truly just be how you really want to be deep down inside, without worrying about any "Repercussions" you might have to deal with coming from people who deep down, only want the same thing. Wow. I've never had a realization like this during a LiveJournal entry haha, so here it is documented: Me realizing why I love being alone so much. The sad thing is though, I will not act any differently than I normally do around other people, and neither will you, no matter how much what I've written makes sense or how much you want it.
I had something else I wanted to write A LOT about but I forget what it was.(I'm pissed)
Since I've been physically taking care of myself lately, I've been nicer, I've been thinking so much and I love it, I've been happier, I've written more music than I have in the last WHO-THE-FUCK-KNOWS-HOW-MANY-MONTHS, my mind is just racing with so many thoughts. When I moved in here and got a job etc, it really threw off my routine of working out all the time. I feel so awesome and clear-minded. I just hope I can stick to it this time. Lethargy really is like a Heroin addiction. It is so easy to just sit around and do nothing. To just give up. It's so easy to wake up and just endure the day, and then watch the sun go down. It's NOT easy to stick to something positive. That seems to always be the case in life. It's hard to do the good things, and easy to do the bad.
Well due to the fact that it's now 6:09, and that it has been over an hour since I started typing (it took me this long 'cus I have a short attention span and kept walking away from the computer and watching TV) I will stop. But for no other reason am I stopping. I could go on for days.
I hate writing this type of shit in livejournal because it makes me sound like I'm going into rehab or detox or something like "oh I'm doin' so good, so much progress is being made, I'VE GOT MY SHIT TOGETHER!!!" like the type of "who are you trying to convince....other people? or yourself?(both pathetic) Shit.....BUT, to simply document what's been going on the last week: I have been working out like crazy, and I am aiming to become truly "Part Animal/Part Machine". I can not WAIT for the next Energy show so I can beat the living SHIT out of myself on"stage". I crave the punishment. I feel so ALIVE when I do it to myself.
Clearly reading that Henry Rollins "Iron" article has gotten to me somewhat.
I can admit that, it's not a bad thing if there's a positive outcome. Just because you are stating what is true, doesn't mean you've proved some kind of point/won some type of argument(An argument clearly only going on in your head because you didn't say anything TO me).(Fuck anyone who doesn't like Family Guy SOLELY because South Park pointed out HOW they make their show. Yes we all know that it's totally random humor. Yes we know it rips off The Simpsons. Congratulations, you pointed out HOW it's fucking hilarious. That doesn't make it all of a sudden NOT FUNNY. Don't get me wrong, South Park is fucking hilarious too but come on.) I will beat you in any argument.
BUT YEAH.
Today I hung out with one of my oldest friends(not oldest like in age but oldest as in one of my first friends), Jere. He's doing pretty good, at least from what he says. He seems pretty well. Hopefully that continues. I invited him to our show this Friday(?) and I'm pretty sure he's going.
I really want to go into a certain topic, and I want to be really in-depth, but I shouldn't. It's just about old friends and how they disappoint me. What I choose not to write about, is how they're disappointing me. Please get better is all I will say. Please take a look around and stop.
I have band practice tomorrow(Today). I wish practicing was more exhilarating. I wish when we went through the set, it was as if we were playing live. I wish it was punishing. I wish I had to prepare for it mentally like a workout. It's different when we're learning new songs/new covers because it would be counter-productive to be flipping out while doing so - nothing would get done. But it can't be that way, because none of us have any jobs to afford a practice space, and we're lucky enough to have a guitarist with parents nice enough to let us be loud and obnoxious in their basement for approx. 4 - 8 hours a week.
As I'm typing this I'm realizing something. I like talking/typing. I like having my thoughts be conveyed. Not that anyone even reads this, but I just like knowing it's out there for people to read. Also, now that I think of it, anytime I'm with people, I basically do anything to express my opinion to them by conveniently manipulating any and all conversation to my liking. Like, even if the conversation doesn't call for any type of opinionated declarations of any sort, sure enough, I will let you know mine, through some weird way that I'll be able to explain how I branched it out, rooting back to what you were talking about.
I'm tired of not being able to be open with everyone. You know what I'm talking about. The awkwardness that exists between all people that doesn't allow them to be exactly how they are when they are all by themselves. I know I can't bare the awkwardness to make the change(at least not quite yet) and I know you can't. So in that, we are one in the same. We are both ourselves, but are afraid that the other will think things(good and/or bad) about the other.
I know that if I acted how I act when I am completely by myself, everyone would think very bad things, but you are the same. You do things that you'd be embarrassed to do in front of anyone but yourself. Why do we put ourselves through this torture all day, every day of our lives? I can't answer that. I love being totally and completely MYSELF so much, that THAT'S why I love being alone so much. That's it. THAT'S IT! I just really have fallen in love with how amazing and liberating it feels to truly just be how you really want to be deep down inside, without worrying about any "Repercussions" you might have to deal with coming from people who deep down, only want the same thing. Wow. I've never had a realization like this during a LiveJournal entry haha, so here it is documented: Me realizing why I love being alone so much. The sad thing is though, I will not act any differently than I normally do around other people, and neither will you, no matter how much what I've written makes sense or how much you want it.
I had something else I wanted to write A LOT about but I forget what it was.(I'm pissed)
Since I've been physically taking care of myself lately, I've been nicer, I've been thinking so much and I love it, I've been happier, I've written more music than I have in the last WHO-THE-FUCK-KNOWS-HOW-MANY-MONTHS, my mind is just racing with so many thoughts. When I moved in here and got a job etc, it really threw off my routine of working out all the time. I feel so awesome and clear-minded. I just hope I can stick to it this time. Lethargy really is like a Heroin addiction. It is so easy to just sit around and do nothing. To just give up. It's so easy to wake up and just endure the day, and then watch the sun go down. It's NOT easy to stick to something positive. That seems to always be the case in life. It's hard to do the good things, and easy to do the bad.
Well due to the fact that it's now 6:09, and that it has been over an hour since I started typing (it took me this long 'cus I have a short attention span and kept walking away from the computer and watching TV) I will stop. But for no other reason am I stopping. I could go on for days.
Friday, January 18, 2008
Jan. 18th, 2008
I didn't go to practice today to rest my throat for the show tomorrow. I am going to get my eyebrows done before I go. I actually have a little bit of money so I'm happy that I'm able to do this. I wrote some lyrics today for one of our new songs. pretty happy about that. Didn't finish it, but it's better progress than I've been making so that's good. I wonder how the 9 band show is going to go tomorrow... hmm, Idk. I'm really bored, I think I'm going to watch tv.
Monday, January 14, 2008
Jan. 14th, 2008
Well instead of only updating when I want to kill myself, maybe I'll update right now.
I have a cold. my nose is all stuffed up. I need to write a ton of music fast. I have to do laundry at my moms tomorrow. my hair sucks today. I made 2 pies today. I ate one. I'm considering eating the other one. I'm disgusting. Watched that Chuck and Larry movie tonight, it was pretty good I liked it. It's not some piece of cinematic genius or anything, it's just a pretty good movie. Cool message behind it, especially seeing as it was a pretty big movie, probably aggravated a lot of Christians. Poochie won't stop causing mischief. I am bored. I have a "Free" tattoo basically waiting for me to come and get it, and I've yet to find a time when I can go. Earth Crisis is playing Feb 29th, I'm excited. It's probably pissing you off that I'm typing like this, but you can't quite pin-point what it is exactly that's pissing you off about it, so you're just saying "what an idiot" well I'm better than you. I'm downloading the new NJFILMCORE movie that apparently has Energy in it. Check it out, and by the time you read this and watch it, it MIGHT have loaded halfway on my computer.
I'm done.
I have a cold. my nose is all stuffed up. I need to write a ton of music fast. I have to do laundry at my moms tomorrow. my hair sucks today. I made 2 pies today. I ate one. I'm considering eating the other one. I'm disgusting. Watched that Chuck and Larry movie tonight, it was pretty good I liked it. It's not some piece of cinematic genius or anything, it's just a pretty good movie. Cool message behind it, especially seeing as it was a pretty big movie, probably aggravated a lot of Christians. Poochie won't stop causing mischief. I am bored. I have a "Free" tattoo basically waiting for me to come and get it, and I've yet to find a time when I can go. Earth Crisis is playing Feb 29th, I'm excited. It's probably pissing you off that I'm typing like this, but you can't quite pin-point what it is exactly that's pissing you off about it, so you're just saying "what an idiot" well I'm better than you. I'm downloading the new NJFILMCORE movie that apparently has Energy in it. Check it out, and by the time you read this and watch it, it MIGHT have loaded halfway on my computer.
I'm done.
Monday, January 7, 2008
Jan. 7th, 2008
Hmmm, where do I start
I got tattooed 2 times in the last few weeks(one more time any day now) pretty happy about that.
I'm thinking of getting my hair cut....just the dead/split ends, maybe cutting it short in the back, cus it's getting long and I'm eventually going for a "one-length" type of thing. This is a pretty close idea as to what I've been going for:
I got fired from my job, kind of a bummer, no more money coming in. I'll have to get one somewhere else. Although, this does afford me more time to write music for the new Energy cd that we're working on. Because with a job, nothing in my life gets accomplished at all.
We're doing 2 more instrumental songs with Chris Curran this Thursday, I can't wait. I always love hearing the songs come to life in the studio, I just wish I could write faster, but whatever, it'll all work out fine. I COULD write fast, if I wrote like every other shitty band these days and just accepted the first melody that came to my mind that was boring as hell. But I try to make every melody interesting(at least to me) and I'm always happy in the end. I could write music like all these soulless garbage "musicians" and just pump out lousy shit all the time, anyone that can control their voice enough to hit notes(anyone who's not TONE DEAF) can. But there's something that some people understand that others don't. Darkbuster - Gets it. The Descendants - Get it. AFI - Gets it. Just 3 bands off the top of my head out of many. Others don't...haha. And I can't say they won't get "big" either because the masses are stupid and accept what they're told to like.
Whatever, I'm going to stop myself there so I'm not rambling too much and I don't annoy myself.
Oh yeah
Yesterday was awesome, me and Julia went to Grasshopper and I had the best meal of my entire life, then we went and saw Sweeney Todd, def one of the best days I've had in a while =)
I got tattooed 2 times in the last few weeks(one more time any day now) pretty happy about that.
I'm thinking of getting my hair cut....just the dead/split ends, maybe cutting it short in the back, cus it's getting long and I'm eventually going for a "one-length" type of thing. This is a pretty close idea as to what I've been going for:
I got fired from my job, kind of a bummer, no more money coming in. I'll have to get one somewhere else. Although, this does afford me more time to write music for the new Energy cd that we're working on. Because with a job, nothing in my life gets accomplished at all.
We're doing 2 more instrumental songs with Chris Curran this Thursday, I can't wait. I always love hearing the songs come to life in the studio, I just wish I could write faster, but whatever, it'll all work out fine. I COULD write fast, if I wrote like every other shitty band these days and just accepted the first melody that came to my mind that was boring as hell. But I try to make every melody interesting(at least to me) and I'm always happy in the end. I could write music like all these soulless garbage "musicians" and just pump out lousy shit all the time, anyone that can control their voice enough to hit notes(anyone who's not TONE DEAF) can. But there's something that some people understand that others don't. Darkbuster - Gets it. The Descendants - Get it. AFI - Gets it. Just 3 bands off the top of my head out of many. Others don't...haha. And I can't say they won't get "big" either because the masses are stupid and accept what they're told to like.
Whatever, I'm going to stop myself there so I'm not rambling too much and I don't annoy myself.
Oh yeah
Yesterday was awesome, me and Julia went to Grasshopper and I had the best meal of my entire life, then we went and saw Sweeney Todd, def one of the best days I've had in a while =)
Jan. 7th, 2008
Hmmm, where do I start
I got tattooed 2 times in the last few weeks(one more time any day now) pretty happy about that.
I'm thinking of getting my hair cut....just the dead/split ends, maybe cutting it short in the back, cus it's getting long and I'm eventually going for a "one-length" type of thing. This is a pretty close idea as to what I've been going for:
I got tattooed 2 times in the last few weeks(one more time any day now) pretty happy about that.
I'm thinking of getting my hair cut....just the dead/split ends, maybe cutting it short in the back, cus it's getting long and I'm eventually going for a "one-length" type of thing. This is a pretty close idea as to what I've been going for:
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